Still Walking Happily Into the Sunset

Five years ago today my best friend and I decided to stay best friends for the rest of our life. Hmmm...rather, we committed to being best friends for the rest of our lives. It was a beautiful sunny day in Southern California, and thank God, because I had decided I wanted an outdoor wedding...in January. We had our friends and family with us, and as church bell rang I arrived in a horse-drawn carriage to meet my prince. How the time flies! Now if I was in a horse-drawn carriage I'd be hanging onto Riley to keep him from falling out while Robbie kept up a consistent chatter of, "We're in a carriage, mom? That's the horse! Go faster! I love this! This is my favorite," etc., etc.
David and I have both grown up and changed in the last five years, added a couple babies, painted many walls, tried to figure out why we can never have all vehicles running properly at the same time, and many adventures. I'm still not the perfect wife, but I still aspire to be. And the longer I'm married to my best friend the more I realize how perfect he is for me. I thought I knew that five years ago...so I can't wait for the next five.

It's Too Soon for Winter Blues...

Yes, they had their hands washed after this.

Tomorrow the realtor is coming by to look over house before we put it up for sale. Today I woke up knowing there was still a lot of cleaning and de-junking I wanted to do before she came. I also woke feeling lousy and haven't decided if I've caught the flu or pulled a stomach muscle when I was kickboxing yesterday. The boys woke up with a disgusting amount of energy. They must have known I watched the movie Limitless last weekend and want me to feel even more inadequate with my ability to keep up with them in particular, and life in general. David accidentally left for work with my van key, so no groceries or grocery shopping which was #1 on my list for the day. The weather decided to join the fun by falling from the mid-70s to the mid-30s. Throw in some rain and mud and there's no outdoor outlet for little boys with gobs of energy. In between trying to keep them from pulling all the eggs out of the refrigerator AGAIN, stopping them from drinking straight from the water filter (new trick), unwrapping the Christmas presents, and traumatizing the cat, I had an epiphany: redirect this energy into something that might be useful to me. Consequently I taught them how to wash windows today. They were pretty good at it. We moved into the guest bathroom and they loved scrubbing the toilet and cleaning the mirrors. This day might be survivable after all!

Too Precious for Words...Almost!

Almost a year after Robbie and I had to spend a month in speech therapy, my little man is talking up a storm and it tickles me to death. Combined with the fact that he is able to remember things we talk about in school and it feels like I'm getting somewhere as a mother.
On the way to church on Sunday, Robbie was happily pointing out every landmark we passed. "That's Taco Bell! That's the computer store (Staples), that's ice cream (Dairy Queen)."
Suddenly Robbie got quiet for a second and said in a hushed voice as we passed a statue of a pioneering town father, "That's an idol."

Rediscovering the Magic

Peter Pan has always been one of my favorite stories. I love the book, love the Disney movie, love the ride at Disneyland, and if anyone ever asks one of those, "What kind of super power would you like to have?" questions my answer is always to be able to fly. I always wished I could be Wendy for Halloween or in a play, but alas, I never had a blue nightgown and I grew up.
Last night was one of those perfect family nights that came together naturally without any of the planning I usually put into our official "Family Fun Nights." David has had Sharathon at the radio station this week which usually makes me feel like a single mother as he leaves for work super early, gets home super late, and the boys are super hyper (some sort of side effect of not getting to see their dad). I don't know if I'm getting used to it, and therefore able to function better, or if Sharathon is truly settling down. After surviving the last couple days where we haven't been able to play outside as much because of the rain, finding my lipstick smeared all over Robbie's face, salt being poured all over the kitchen floor (I'll admit...pouring salt on the floor did look fun), David asked if we could come have dinner with him last night at the radio station. Even though I'd made huge plans to make a homemade lasagna and French bread to take the guys tonight in an effort to get a little family time in, I still jumped at the opportunity to grab a pack of tacos and hang at the radio station for a little while last night.
After scattering lettuce and taco meat through the station, juggling with fruit, Robbie talking on the air, trying keep Riley from eating the fish food, and good-old fashioned "boys and their dad roughhousing," I was ready to pack the boys up and brace myself for the next hour until I could put them to bed. Then David's boss decided things were going well enough that my sweetie could come home with us!
After driving through a horrific rain storm and realizing we were all ready to be in for the rest of the evening, I whipped up a batch of fully loaded brownies (chocolate with walnuts, marshmallows, and chocolate chips thrown in for good measure), then we settled down to watch the Disney version of Peter Pan. With the exception of seeing the first 10 minutes on YouTube, it was a first for David and Robbie. For me it was sweetly nostalgic, but seeing it come alive for Robbie was magical. He thought Tinkerbell was an angel, adored Nana, loved little Michael, laughed whenever someone bonked their head, and cheered when Captain Hook fell into the crocodile's mouth. As I watched his little face glued to the screen the wheels in my mind begin spinning...how many more children do I need to have before I can make them be the Peter Pan cast for Halloween?

Book Review: Friendship Bread

In a way, Friendship Bread by Darien Gee is your typical circle of friendship type book that takes a variety of characters from a variety of backgrounds, each fighting private battles and hiding dark secrets, introduces them, unravels their secrets, and by the end of the book, the power of friendship changes their lives. Simple enough. The different element that sets Friendship Bread apart is come from the main title--Amish friendship bread, a baked goods type of chain letter (I remember when friendship bread was circling our group of friends in the late 90s).
Three hurting women are brought together when one of them unexpectedly receives a plate of Amish friendship bread and a bag of starter on her doorstep. As the three hurting women begin passing the bread around town, their own friendship begins to grow. As the bread continues to circulate, people are soon wrestling with what, exactly, to do with the overabundance of friendship bread in their town. Enter a natural disaster in a nearby town and voila! As everyone joins to together as part of a friendship bread army friendships are made and mended, and relationships are restored.
In spite of the many "different-types-of-people-become-friends" books are out there, I still enjoy them. Although Friendship Bread took about eight chapters to finally finish introducing each of the main characters and gain enough continuity to begin the story, it eventually found its footing and from there onward was an incredibly charming character study of the trials, tribulations, and triumphs of life and friendship in a small town. Once again there was a flighty, scatterbrained little sister struggling to grow up (a far cry from the strong, independent, albeit stubborn baby sister I'm used to), but I've decided that's just the current trend for baby sisters in modern fiction.
The main portion of the story was written in the present tense which takes me awhile to get used to. To make it more confusing, the author would switch to writing in the past tense when characters were remembering past events, and then switch back to present tense was always a little jarring. Still, it was a sweet little story that left me wanting to bake some friendship bread.
Rating: 7/10

What My Summer Reading Program Taught Me

Obviously after reading fifty books in one summer I learned a lot about life in general, current trends in both fiction and non-fiction, and a few things about myself as well. I probably could have learned even more if I had been barreling through the books as quickly as I did, but if hadn't set a goal for myself I doubt I would have read anything this summer, so I figure I've still come out ahead.
This summer I've learned/changed/started to...
1.  I learned to keep a writing journal nearby so I could jot down notes, thoughts, and ideas I would get after reading or whenever--having a big purse to stash a notebook in helped.
2.  Having quiet time with the Lord regularly--I read my Bible daily, but after reading It's All About Him I was convicted that I don't make the most of the time I do spend reading my Bible, tending to rush through it. That lead me to...
3. Wake up earlier. After marrying David I became more of a late to bed/late to rise type because it fit our lifestyle best. Consequently, I would be waking up at 7:30 about the same time as the boys and then rushing around trying to get everyone ready for the day. If I was doing good, I would wake up at 7:00 to workout which had me finishing right about the time everyone was getting up, which I had to rush through showering, dressing, and hurrying to get breakfast. It wasn't odd at all for the boys to still be in their pajamas at 10:00. I quickly realized that I needed to take care of the things important to me early in the morning before everyone else woke up if I was going to have time to read during the day. So I started waking up at 6 and spending half an hour having quiet time with the Lord, half an hour working out, and then half an hour blogging. I was amazed by the difference the first couple weeks. After my hour and a half alone were finished I felt on top of the world and genuinely ready to tackle the day. I no longer felt "behind" all day, and have been able to accomplish so much more during the days. I felt like I'd finally arrived at the next step or maturity and mommyhood and now I'm quite jealous of my time alone, and feel horribly scrambled and lost if I miss it for a day.
4.  Okay, this is kind of cheesy, but here goes...I can do ANYTHING! Yep, some people have gone through some pretty rotten stuff but still managed to fight for their dreams. If they can, I can.
5.  I need to weigh myself daily. As Betty White is her book, one pound is easy to take, two are harder, and once you get to five they're stuck.
6. WWII fiction is "in".
7.  If the current round of WWII fiction is to be believed sex and lust were the only reasons anyone survived the war (be prepared for some bad reviews with low ratings).
8. Writing fiction in the present tense is a current trend and I don't really care for it.
9.  I need to be honest, truthful, "raw" in my own writing.
10.  Looking over the books I read I realized I'm extremely interested in repressed, downtrodden, hurting, or abused women.
11.  I don't have to be defined by my circumstances. I can overcome difficulties.
12.  A worldview without Christ is very sad.
13. Perspective takes time. Immediately after difficult or tragic situation we feel as though we intimately know everything there is to know about, but to genuinely understand its impact, weight and bearing on our life takes time. I understand the push to get a book published quickly while the public is still interested in the subject matter, but I felt that some books were written so soon after a tragedy that the perspective was jilted.
14. Growing old is depressing for the unsaved.
That's just a start, but looking over the list I feel like these things alone made my reading program worthwhile.

Book Review: Stolen Innocence

I had been so intrigued by Carolyn Jessop's story in Escape that I continued the trend by reading Stolen Innocence by Elissa Wall, another young woman who stood up to the abuse in the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints (FLDS) cult and escaped to freedom. Unlike Jessop, however, Wall spent more time in the cult after it took its scary turn into tighter control and extremism.
Wall grew up loving her religion and trying her best to be a good FLDS girl. She lived in a polygamist home, but the pressures of more than one wife and over 20 children caused a strain on the family leading to many tense moments as her father struggled to control the household. After many complaints to church hierarchy over the years, and after several of her free-thinking older siblings had left the church, Elissa's mother and remaining children were taken away from their husband/father and reassigned to another man.
As a twelve year-old, Elissa struggled with having the family she loved broken up and trying to fit into a new household with dozens of wives and even more children. At the age fourteen, her new father began to notice her talents in the kitchen and shortly thereafter, decide she was ready to be assigned in marriage.
Elissa dreaded the idea, especially since her soon-to-be husband was a 21 year-old cousin she had never gotten along with. She made appointments with her step-father and Warren Jeffs, begging to either not be forced into marriage, or allowed to wait two years. They denied her requests.
Elissa though her wedding day was one of the most traumatic days of her life, but the next three years were worse. Raised to believe that boys were "poisonous snakes" and never allowed to touch them, Elissa was confused and frightened as her husband raped her on a regular basis. She tried to confide in and seek help from her mother and other church leaders, but they all admonished her to submit husband and things would work out. After suffering several miscarriages and being told by her older sisters that she didn't have to let her husband do anything she didn't want him to, she finally began sleeping in her truck to avoid her husband. One night while out in the truck, she got a flat tire, and was helped out by Lamont Barlow, a young man who had been kicked out of the church.
Elissa and Lamont became friends, then slowly fell in love. By this time Elissa was ready to leave the cult, but wavered over her worry for the two little sisters she would leave behind. Finally realizing she couldn't continue to live the way she had, she left the church, her husband, and family and started a new life outside the cult with Lamont.
Elissa's marriage eventually became the basis for one of the first lawsuits again Warren Jeffs. She related that during the ordeal of the trial, being forced into witness protection due to threats from the FLDS, having to testify, face Jeffs and her former husband, she always believed Jeffs would get away with it as he always had in the past. The guilty verdict came as a huge relief.
Stolen Innocence is quite a comprehensive look at life in the FLDS and Elissa's story in particular. She covers her childhood, growing up in polygamous families, the physical, sexual, and emotional abuse that was not uncommon, how brainwashing took place, and in spite of all the bad experiences, the struggle to leave behind everything you'd been raised to believe was right as you try to adjust to life on the outside. While Elissa touches on all these subjects and more, she merely grazed the treetops on most of them, preferring to say, "There was a lot of tension," "It was not a good situation." As her life unraveled she gave more and more details, so reader beware...there is some rather heavy adult content in this book, but if it helps any one person become more aware of the plight of abused women she will have accomplished her purpose.